Murder On Account Read online

“Hi, Kat. How’s it rolling?” Joe was the owner of the café. A rotund man in his early fifties, he was a walking advert for his own food.

  “Alright thanks, Joe.”

  “I hear that boss of yours met a sticky end. You didn’t do it, did you?”

  “Innocent.”

  “I wouldn’t have blamed you if you had. Roy always was a tosser. What can I get you?”

  “I’ll have a mocha with double cream and a marshmallow.”

  “You’ll have a filter coffee and like it.”

  “Okay. Give me one of those gingerbread men too, would you?”

  “Gingerbread person if you don’t mind. Haven’t you heard they’re gender neutral now?”

  “Is that an excuse to make them smaller?”

  “Probably.”

  When Zero arrived ten minutes later, I handed him a fiver, and told him to get himself a drink.

  “Like I said on the phone, there’s a possibility I may have something for you.”

  “Cool. What do you have in mind?”

  “Before I start, I ought to point out that I’m not going to be able to pay much to begin with. It’ll be minimum wage initially, but if things work out, that should increase pretty quickly.”

  “I’m cool with that. What is it you do, exactly?”

  “I’m a private investigator.”

  “Really? Sweet. What would I be doing?”

  “I’ll be spending a lot of time out of the office. I need someone who can field calls from clients and potential clients while I’m out.”

  “No problem.”

  “Also, as I mentioned before, I’ll need someone to do the bookkeeping.”

  “Okay.”

  “On top of that, it’ll be pretty much anything I throw at you.”

  “Sounds good to me. When do I start?”

  “Now would be as good a time as any. Can you manage that?”

  “Sure.”

  “Great. Drink up, we’ll go to the office and I’ll show you your desk. By the way, what do I call you? People don’t really call you Zero, do they?”

  “Why wouldn’t they? That’s my name.”

  If Zero was unimpressed by my offices, he managed to hide it well.

  “That will be yours.” I pointed to the desk which until a couple of hours earlier had belonged to Sheila.

  “Cool.” He spun around on the chair. “What do I call you? Boss?”

  “Kat will do just fine. I have to go out in a few minutes. If anyone calls, you should answer the phone as R.K. Investigations. If you need to talk to me about anything, just give me a call. You have my number, don’t you?”

  “Yeah, it’s on my mobile. What else do you want me to do?”

  “I’d like you to find out exactly what open cases my boss was working on.”

  “I thought you were the boss?”

  “Sorry, I probably should have explained.”

  I gave Zero the Cliff Notes version of what had happened to Roy.

  “So I guess that means you’ve only just taken over the business?”

  “That’s right. Does that change your mind about wanting to take the job?”

  “No way. I like a challenge.”

  “That’s probably just as well. Anyway, I’d better get going.”

  “Before you do, where will I find the info on the cases? Is it on here?” He pointed to the computer.

  “I wish. The computer was only ever used to send out letters and bills. All the cases are on paper in that filing cabinet behind you.”

  “That’s crazy.”

  “It’s just how Roy worked. He was stuck in the seventies. You only had to look at the way he dressed to know that.”

  “What about the accounts? Are they on computer?”

  “No, they’re all paper-based too. Roy took the books home with him on Saturday. I’ll have to try to get those back from his house if I can.”

  Chapter 7

  The usual place, as Christine had referred to it, was Pointers coffee shop, just off Denmark Street. For some reason, I was feeling ridiculously nervous about seeing her again after all this time. Although I would never have called us BFFs (I wouldn’t call anyone a BFF because I’m not thirteen), we had once been good friends.

  I arrived a few minutes early and took a seat by the window, so I could keep a lookout for her. We spotted one another at pretty much the same time. Her hair was longer than the last time I’d seen her, and if I wasn’t mistaken, she’d coloured it a little. Christine had always been the fashion conscious one, and that obviously hadn’t changed. She looked fabulous.

  We hugged a very awkward hug.

  “Great to see you again, Kat. Thanks for agreeing to meet me.”

  “No problem. How have you been keeping?”

  “Oh, you know.”

  I didn’t, but based on the tone of her voice, I guessed the answer was probably: not great.

  Once we had our drinks, we found a table at the back of the shop.

  “I was surprised to hear from you.” I took a sip of the over-priced Americano.

  “I’ve been trying to find the courage to contact you for a couple of weeks.”

  “That’s silly.”

  “Is it, though? I told you I didn’t ever want to see you again.”

  “And don’t forget, you said that I was dead to you.” I grinned.

  “I did say that, didn’t I?” She at least had the good grace to blush. “You must have thought I was a right idiot.”

  “Yeah, I did.”

  “I’m really sorry.” She was threading the spoon back and forth through her fingers. “About everything.”

  “Forget it. We all say stupid things.”

  “Like when you said you were going to run away to join the circus?”

  “Did I say that?”

  “Yes, but then you were a little drunk at the time. Where are you living now?”

  “In Lewford.”

  “Are you with anyone?”

  “No, it’s just me and the cockroaches.”

  “It’s not as bad as that, is it?”

  “Not quite. What about you? Where do you live now?”

  “Purley.”

  “Flat?”

  “No, we’ve got a small terraced house.”

  “Nice.”

  “Are you still doing the private investigation stuff?”

  “Yeah, for the moment at least.”

  “You’re probably wondering why I contacted you out of the blue.”

  “I figured you’d get around to telling me when you were ready.”

  “It’s Ralph.”

  “I thought it might be.”

  “If you want to say you told me so, I wouldn’t blame you.”

  “What’s he done?”

  “We got married last year.”

  “What? Get out of here.”

  She held up her left hand, and for the first time, I noticed the wedding ring. “Where was my invitation?”

  “I—err—I’m really—”

  “It’s okay. I’m only kidding. You did me a favour. I hate weddings, and at least I didn’t have to fork out for a present.”

  “I’m sorry I didn’t believe you when you told me that Ralph was cheating on me. I should never have accused you of being jealous.”

  “What changed your mind?”

  “I think he’s cheating on me now.”

  “What makes you think that?”

  “It’s a lot of little things. He’s been acting really weird for about a month. Normally, he gets home at the same time every day, but recently he’s been making all kinds of excuses for getting home late. And even when he is home, he barely has two words to say to me. It’s as though he’s there, but he’s not, if you know what I mean?”

  “Have you confronted him about the way he’s been acting?”

  “Yes, but he said it was all in my imagination. That’s why I contacted you. I’m hoping you’ll be able to find out what’s going on.”

  “I’m not sure that
’s a good idea.”

  “Please, Kat. I know I treated you badly, but I really need this. I’ve got a good job now, so I can pay you.”

  “It’s not that. Ralph knows me, remember. Surveillance is difficult enough when the target isn’t likely to recognise you.”

  “He only met you a couple of times, and besides, you’ve changed since then.”

  “Got older, you mean?”

  “No. Your hair is much shorter. It suits you, by the way.”

  “Thanks.”

  “And you’re slimmer too. Have you been working out?”

  “Not really. I just can’t afford to eat a lot of the time.”

  “Are you still working at the same place?”

  “Yes and no. I’m still at R.K. Investigations, but I run the business now.”

  “Since when?”

  “Since a couple of days ago when the previous owner was murdered.”

  “That’s what I like about you, Kat.” She laughed. “You always did have a sense of humour.”

  “Actually, I’m not joking. He really was murdered.”

  “Oh? I’m sorry. Will you do this for me, Kat? Please.”

  “Do you have any idea who Ralph is cheating with?”

  “I’ve got a pretty good idea who it is. I’m almost certain it’s the woman he works with. She’s new, and it was shortly after she started working there that he changed. I wish I’d listened to you. I could have saved myself all this grief.”

  “Where does he work?”

  “At a betting shop in Greenwich: BetMore, do you know it?”

  “Not offhand, but I live just up the road, so it shouldn’t take much finding.”

  “Will you take the case, Kat? Please.”

  “Sure, why not?”

  ***

  Back at the office, Zero’s desk was surrounded by a sea of cardboard box files. Meanwhile, the man himself was busy tapping away at the keyboard.

  “Don’t worry if you haven’t managed to make any sense of it yet.” I sat on the edge of his desk. “I should have some time to go through it with you tomorrow.”

  “There’s no need. It’s almost done.”

  “Already?”

  “There wasn’t much to go through. The only live cases I could find were those you’re working on. It doesn’t appear that your boss was working on anything. In fact, the last case assigned to him was closed three months ago. The only other cases are those assigned to someone called West.”

  “That’s Westy.”

  “It looks like he’s worked on a few cases over the last year, but they all appear to be closed too.”

  “That can’t be right. Westy must have been working on something recently because he came around here chasing his money.”

  “Well, if he is, the case file isn’t in that filing cabinet.”

  “Are you sure about all of this?”

  “One hundred percent, but you’re welcome to double-check my findings.”

  “You’re telling me that Roy hasn’t worked on any cases in the last three months?”

  “Correct.”

  “So, if I understand you correctly, the only money coming into the business was from the cases I was working on?”

  “That’s right. And maybe a few that Westy was working on.”

  “Unbelievable! He was always giving me a hard time for not pulling my weight.” I laughed, but I actually felt like crying. “I’ll kill him.”

  “It seems someone beat you to that. Having seen this mess, I’m really concerned about the accounts. Do you have any idea what the balance sheet looks like?”

  “I wouldn’t know one if someone smacked me in the face with it.”

  “You need to get hold of the books as soon as possible. I’m worried this business could be insolvent.”

  “I’m guessing that’s not a good thing.”

  “You’d be right about that.”

  “If it is—err—?”

  “Insolvent.”

  “What can I do about it?”

  “You need to bring in more work and cash, fast.”

  “I can’t believe you got all that done so quickly.”

  “It wasn’t difficult. This is a fairly simple business. I’ve also put the live cases into an online case management system.”

  “How did you manage to do that? Doesn’t it cost money for the software?”

  “I used an open-source application. It was free. I’ve also printed out a list of the open cases.” He leaned back and grabbed a sheet of A4 paper from the printer. “Fulton & Associates, Marston, and Premax. That’s it.”

  “You can close the Marston case. I persuaded her she didn’t need our services.”

  “Why would you do that?”

  “It seemed like the right thing to do at the time. She’s going to drop in and pay us for the time we’ve already spent on the case. Also, you can add one more case to that list: Christine Mather.”

  He began to tap on the keyboard again. “What’s the case about?”

  “Suspected infidelity.”

  “Got it. Any others?”

  “I’m going to be investigating Roy’s murder for his daughter, Anne.”

  “Okay.”

  “We won’t be getting paid for that one, though.”

  “Can you afford to do pro bono work?”

  “Probably not, but I’m not going to charge Anne for trying to find her father’s murderer.”

  “You’re the boss. What this business really needs is some kind of online presence. How do you expect anyone to even know it’s here?”

  “That’s what Half-An-Ear said.”

  “Who’s Half-An-Ear?”

  “Vic the printer. He said I needed to sort out my social media, but I wouldn’t know where to start. And besides, I can’t afford it.”

  “I can sort all of that out for you—no problem.”

  “What about the cost?”

  “It won’t cost you a penny.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Piece of cake. I can have it done by this time tomorrow.”

  “I’m starting to like you, even if you do have a weird name.”

  Just then, the door flew open and in walked Westy. He had the distinction of being the only man I knew with a worse dress sense than Roy.

  “I want my money!” His pig breath was as bad as ever.

  “You can’t just come bursting in here like this, Westy.”

  “I can when you owe me money.”

  “What are you talking about? I don’t owe you a penny.”

  “A little bird told me that you’d taken over Roy’s business.”

  “I have. So what?”

  “Then you’ve taken over his debts too.”

  “There are no open cases assigned to you,” Zero chipped in.

  “Who’s this idiot?” Westy glared at Zero.

  “He’s my new assistant. He’s just brought the case management system up to date, and you heard what he said: There are no cases assigned to you.”

  “I don’t care about your fancy systems. I’ve been working a case for Roy. I’m owed money and I expect to get it.”

  “What have you been working on?”

  “None of your business.”

  “It is my business if you expect me to pay you for it.”

  “Get me the money, and I’ll hand over the file.”

  “Hand over the file and I’ll think about it.”

  “No chance. Money first.”

  “How much did Roy owe you?”

  “A grand.”

  “Cobblers. No way Roy would have paid you a grand.”

  “It’s a grand!”

  “I don’t have that kind of money.”

  “You’d better find it by the end of the week or you’ll be sorry.”

  “Is that a threat?”

  “You’ll find out.” And with that, he made for the door.

  “Nice to see you too, Westy.”

  “Shouldn’t you be more worried about that guy?” Zero
said, once Westy had left.

  “Probably.”

  ***

  Given the dire state of the business, all my attention should have been focussed on the three paying cases I had on the books, but I’d made a promise to Anne that I’d try to find out who’d murdered her father, and I intended to keep that promise.

  My relationship with the local police wasn’t the best. During the time I’d been working for Roy, I’d had a number of run-ins with them, and I’d ended up in a cell twice. Only for a few hours both times, and nothing that resulted in my being charged with anything. Fortunately for me, there wasn’t a law against being a pain in their backside, otherwise I would have done serious jail time.

  I did still have one friendly contact on the force, though. Bruce Layne was an old-school copper who was a few years away from retirement. He didn’t have much time for modern policing methods or for any of his bosses. He and I had met a couple of years earlier when I’d been working on a case where a lovely old lady had been conned out of most of her life savings. I’d been struck by the compassion he’d shown to her; he’d definitely gone above and beyond. The money was never recovered, and Enid had died a few months later. Bruce and I had been amongst the few mourners at her funeral.

  I gave him a call.

  “Hey, Batman. How’s it going?”

  “That never gets old. What’s up, Kat?”

  “I was just thinking that I hadn’t seen you for a long time.”

  “What you really mean is that you want something.”

  “Why would you say that?”

  “Because you always do.”

  “How about five o’clock in The Orchard?”

  “Are the drinks on you?”

  “Of course.”

  “Okay, I’ll see you there.”

  Chapter 8

  “I’m going out, Zero,” I said.

  “Before you go, can I have your phone for a minute?”

  “Why?”

  “I want to install an app on it.”

  “Nothing too high tech, I hope.” I handed him my phone anyway.

  “How long have you had this thing?” He grinned.

  “What’s wrong with it?”

  “I didn’t think they still made these.”

  “It does everything I need.”

  He played around with it for a couple of minutes, and then beckoned me to take a look. “I’ve installed TimeLogMaster.”